The threads that bind us

Date: 20 Dec 2007
Time: 1532 hrs
Place: Plaza Singapura Spotlight

(sorf) Got asked about thread at the DMC counter by a woman with a Chinese accent.

The long and short of it

Date: 16 Dec 2007
Time: 1027 hrs
Place: Downstairs from the block

(both) We're downstairs at the carpark walking in when this auntie with a red flowery shirt and red lipstick and henna-ed hair, asking, "xiao jie, where's the market?" and pointing one way then another. In fact, both routes would have worked, but we set her off in the direction that was shorter.

It's on the map

Date: 04 Dec 2007
Time: 1014 hrs
Place: Bus stop at corner of Bencoolen and Bras Basah

I'm sitting and reading my book at the bus stop waiting for the bus when a bunch of Korean tourists (two ladies and a little girl) ran up to me and asked me where Dhoby Ghaut MRT was. I told them to walk down the road and follow the curve and the MRT entrance was there. The interesting thing was that she had written "Dhoby Ghaut MRT" on her tourist map. Not that it helped her find the place...

Water tight

Date: 30 Oct 2007
Time: 1758 hrs
Place: Raffles Place MRT

I'm at the 7-11 store inside Raffles Place MRT when a lady holding a file and a red handbag, wearing red top and jeans, asked me to help her open a bottle of mineral water. It was quite tight. I had to use my handkerchief for grip.

From the golden shoe or the bay?

Date: 11 Oct 2007
Time: 1634 hrs
Place: Esplanade bus stop

(sorf) Small teenaged girl in pink tank top and jeans asked me whether bus 162 comes to the bus stop and if it's from Shenton Way or Marina. I was plugged into the iPod and there were tons of other people around.

Citiblanket

Date: 10 Oct 2007
Time: 1455 hrs
Place: near Isetan Scotts

(sorf) Got stopped by a Citibank promoter. They're everywhere!

Live office directory

Date: 9 Oct 2007
Time: 1400 hrs
Place: The office

(sorf) Two girls asked me where two of my colleagues sit.

Auntie hunts for bargain

Date: 29 Sep 2007
Time: 1229 hrs
Place: BHG at Bugis

(both) We were near the escalators at BHG when an auntie wearing a brown t-shirt asking "Miss, do you know where they sell the eating utensils?" and we told her that it was outside the departmental store because they moved (which is why she couldn't find it walking around).

The time for politeness is now!

Date: 20 Jul 2007
Time: 1803 hrs
Place: Harbourfront MRT Station entrance

I was just about to enter the cavernous stairwell that leads down to the Harbourfront MRT station when a 20-something Malay man, dressed in a red cap, brown t-shirt, jeans and slippers, and staring out of the window towards at the cars passing by on the road, approached me and asked me very politely, "Excuse me sir, what is the time?"

As if to reinforce the point of his lack of timekeeping equipment, he showed me a very bare forearm. I looked at my watch very deliberately and said "6.03" and he said "Thank you", and turned around and continued to look at the road, waiting.

Try the hor fun for fun...

Date: 2 Aug 2007
Time: 1244 hrs
Place: The Factory's canteen

(sorf) In the queue at the canteen and an auntie behind me asks what's good to eat so I said the fish slices hor fun.

You mean those spikes ain't the GPS antenna?

Date: 2 Aug 2007
Time: 1200 hrs
Place: The Factory

(sorf) At my desk and plugged in to my iPod and some guy with spiky gelled hair comes up from behind to ask where Sandra sits.

Bamboo shmamboo

Date: 29 July 2007
Time: 1920 hrs
Place: Carrefour, Plaza Singapura

(sorf) I'm taking a pack of herbs off the rack and a 40-something guy in a polo t-shirt and shorts asked me what it was. Had to say I don't know but it's something my mom uses in herbal chicken soup. Think it's bamboo...

Government within walking distance

Date: 19 July 2007
Time: 1523 hrs
Place: Suntec City bus stop

(sorf) A very well dressed lady with big sunglasses, big hair and paisley shawl asked me at the Suntec City bus stop if bus 36 goes to City Hall. I said I wasn't sure and that you could walk to City Hall. She said she's changing buses.

Follow the 'O'

Date: 17 July 2007
Time: 2019 hrs
Place: Banquet food court, Selegie

(sorf) We had just come home from up north with a load of donuts for our donut-crazed friend. One of the students from the next table at the food court came over to ask where we got the Dunkin' Donuts from. The really should bring it back!

No wonder our cabbies are always nowhere to be found

Date: 17 July 2007
Time: 0932 hrs
Place: Bencoolen Street

Say you are a visitor from another country. You don't know the roads. So you do the smart thing -- you get a card from the hotel with a map so that you can show this to the cab driver and he can bring you to the right place. Isn't this the minimum you could expect?

A taxi pulled up to me (I was waving trying to get one myself), and there was a very confused looking auntie sitting behind with her daughter. She had said card with said map and still the driver asked me where the hotel Strand was. How useless can a cabbie be?

I told him that he was on the wrong street and that Victoria Street was the next one over.

The bus journey to the centre of the Orchard Road

Date: 29 Jun 2007
Time: 2136 hrs
Place: Orchard Road bus stop

(both) We were at the bus stop in front of the Thai Embassy. The bus 106 came, and sorf ran up, but I was stuck behind because I was trying to help a forty-something year old man, wearing blue t-shirt and bermudas, at the bus guide panel, trying to figure out which bus he could take to Centrepoint. When I realised sorf had disappeared, I quickly apologised to the man that I had to leave. Turns out that 106 was just the bus he needed, so he got on right after me.

Suddenly, a maid

Date: 19 Jun 2007
Time: 1951 hrs
Place: Some carpark in Yishun

It's dark as hell, I'm walking home and a maid appeared in front of me out of thin air. Well I think she's a maid. She was wearing grey bermudas and slippers. She asked me where the 7-Eleven was. I pointed her to the nearest 7-Eleven (I think) which was near the bus interchange, giving her directions to cross the road.

Girl from China needs change now!

Date: 11 Jun 2007
Time: 1638 hrs
Place: On a bus near Paragon

(sorf) Some China girl just asked to break a $10 note on the bus.

All this waiting makes one crave coffee

Date: 29 May 2007
Time: 1010 hrs
Place: Bus stop outside Hotel Rendezvous

I am reading the bus services guide to figure out which bus I could take when this short man wearing a batik shirt and grey pants, and a briefcase, sitting on the bench with a young man (his son?) decked out in hip-hop gear (sports jersey and backwards cap), spins around and asks me whether he could pay for the bus using cash because he didn't have an Ez-Link card. I told him that yes, the busses still took cash, and pointed to the box on one of the busses that just stopped where he is supposed to put in the cash, instead of handing it to the driver which he thought was the procedure. I then helped him figure out that it cost $1.70 for him to get to the airport. After a while, bus 36 came, I pointed to it but he had gotten up to walk off with his son, saying that they were going to a cafe to get coffee first.

Ten years

Date: 18 May 2007
Time: 1554 hrs
Place: Tanjong Pagar MRT Station Platform

There I was standing with my head pointed up, neck craned, watching the video they keep playing on a loop, teaching people how to look out for terrorists. I call it the "excuse me sir you've forgotten your bag" video. Without prior warning, this petite auntie, wearing a black sweater and and jeans, just came up to me and asked how to get to Toa Payoh MRT. Well, actually, she already knew, she was just confirming that she needed to transfer trains at Raffles Place to take the train up north. Then she proceeded to confess to me that she had not lived in Singapore for about ten years and that she found it very confusing now. I told her that she was right, and told her it was seven stops to Toa Payoh, then she went back to who I suppose is her daughter, wearing a pink tank top and pink Crocs, maybe 8 or 9, and probably her older sister, an auntie with big hair and a green dress (inappropriately short for her age) and heels, looking about fifty something years old, with a smirk of arrogance on her face.

Most of our Murtabak must have the mosque at the Mustafa

Date: 5 May 2007
Time: 1823 hrs
Place: Just outside TCC at NAFA

(both) We were rushing over to Bras Basah Complex to the Vintage Framemakers shop to collect the freshly framed Japanese lady cross-stitch (which, by the way, turned out really nice). They were closing at 6.30 so we were walking with much purpose. That did not stop an Indian man, wearing a strange combination of a small white hat that looked like a songkok, a blue Catholic Junior College t-shirt and pants and slippers, rapidly approached us and starting saying "moustaba moustaba, planet moustaba". At first I thought he wanted to get to a mosque, so I pointed him down Bencoolen Street towards the mosque, but it didn't seem right to him. I then realised he might be saying Mustafa Plaza, asked him "Mustafa?" and he said "yes, moustaba", so then I pointed him somewhat diagonally towards Selegie Road, though now on hindsight that's a long distance to walk.

At least this time he approached us from the front.

Locally rude

Date: 3 May 2007
Time: 0945 hrs
Place: Sunshine Plaza

(sorf) Just got asked directions in the mall. Indian dude in jeans and red t-shirt looking very harassed just abruptly said to me "Where's the lift ah?" I asked him where he wanted to go and he said "6th floor", then I asked, "office or condo?" Directed him to office lobby and he stalked off with younger Indian man in tow. Didn't even thank me... Think the foreigners are right. Singaporeans are quite rude.

Walking with Barons

Date: 07 Apr 2007
Time: 1604 hrs
Place: Outside Sunshine Plaza

I'm looking away, down the road towards the prata shops, and almost twenty people were waiting to cross the street with me. An Asian dude, wearing three-quarter camouflage pants and a backpack, asked me which way Orchard Road was, with what I think was an Australian accent. Maybe he was a little drunk to be wanting to talk to the back of my head. But I turned around and told him which way to go. He then asked me if it was illegal to walk around with an open can of beer in his hand. I told him no, there's no law against it in Singapore (I think so). And he went off on his way.

But it's a nice place with lots of books...

Date: 15 Mar 2007
Time: 0930 hrs
Place: Outside Sunshine Plaza

She approached me around the corner, almost ambushed me, with young daughter in tow. She was wearing t-shirt and jeans and she asked me where Bugis MRT was. I told her to head towards the library. She said she didn't know where the library was, that she was a foreigner. So I set her off in the general direction.

Centre for Handling Stuff

Date: 13 Mar 2007
Time: 0922 hrs
Place: International Plaza

I had just gotten off a taxi when this Chinese man, looking much like a labourer immigrant, asks me where "Gao Wu Zhong Xin" was. I had no idea what place he was referring to, and even asking him to describe what he needed to be there for was somewhat futile. It seemed that he was late. I pointed him down the general direction towards where I thought the Ministry of Manpower was and he walked away with a frown.

It's all pork to me

Date: 07 Mar 2007
Time: 1125 hrs
Place: Carrefour Plaza Singapura

(sorf) At the meat counter, an auntie asked me which one is "ba tao". I didn't know. Asked her which part of the pig and she said she didn't know. She said she didn't want fat so I pointed out the lean hind to her and she was very happy.

Polite but lost

Date: 02 Mar 2007
Time: 1651 hrs
Place: Near Tanjong Pagar MRT

A guy wearing t-shirt and jeans asked me, "Sir, where is the MRT?"

Looking for the mechanical cai shen

Date: 25 Feb 2007
Time: 1939 hrs
Place: Upper Boon Keng

(sorf) Just outside the 7-Eleven, a young guy in glasses and black t-shirt and jeans, with his girlfriend, asked in Mandarin whether there was a POSB or DBS ATM nearby. Told him it was at the end of the block and to the left.

Spa-stic

Date: 07 Feb 2007
Time:1140 hrs
Place: Cricket Club

(sorf) I was standing at the traffic light waiting to cross over to the Cricket Club when a lady (long hair, glasses, spoke with a China accent) approached me from behind and she showed me a print out of Spacademy's address: 2 Stamford Road. So I said I wasn't sure but we were standing on Stamford Road so I pointed her down towards the Capitol Building. Midway through our conversation this kaypoh senior citizen male interrupted and asked "Are you looking for some place?". He didn't know where it was either.

Test results

Date: 24 Jan 2007
Time: 1100 hrs
Place: IOI Plaza

I had just crossed Middle Road to IOI Plaza when a middle aged balding man asked me in Mandarin, where is 30 Kelantan Road? He was showing me the address on a piece of paper that looked like it was some kind of test results slip for a medical checkup. I gave him the rough directions (he seemed to know the place as "dan shui jie" or ordinary water street?) and he went off.

Nobody loves you when you're down and out

Date: 23 Jan 2007
Time: 1123 hrs
Place: Lift lobby at home

(sorf) Two guys in the lift lobby just asked me which way is out.

Boo-jees

Date: 13 Jan 2007
Time: 1546 hrs
Place: corner of Bencoolen Street and Middle Road

(both) This tall Caucasian was gazing befuddledly at his map and he asked us where Queen Street was. We asked him where he wanted to go, and he said Bugis except he thought it was pronounced "Boo-jees". We pointed him the right way (towards the Library) and sent him on his way.

Sim Lim Forest

Date: 10 Jan 2007
Time: 1408 hrs
Place: SMU, outside School of Economics

(sorf) Two Asian guys (don't know where they are from because they have a funny accent) stopped me outside the School of Economics to ask where Sim Lim is. One dude was in a white shirt and black pants and the other dude was in a black shirt and blue pants. I sort of waved in the general direction of the electronics heaven and told them that it was quite far, about a ten to fifteen minute walk. And they thanked me and walked away in the direction of Hotel Rendezvous.